festive front entry

Saucy's collection of red and green ornaments made their way into the front entry this year.

Nothing says fun and funky at the holidays than red and green, especially if the green tends towards a hit of lime.

The presents under this small tree are colour - coded. If it's wrapped in red and green, it's one of the gifts that goes out of the house. Once this tree is bare underneath, Saucy knows all of her shipping and deliveries are finished.

The awesome glittery sign is from Dollarama. Hell, most of Saucy's decorations are from the dollar store, but you knew that already.

The spool of baker's twine is from Anthropologie. Saucy's kicking herself that she didn't get the green one also.

The light from the tiny staircase window catches the glittery stuff on the tree and it sprays sparkles all over the walls.

It's magical.

The candy at the front door disappears quickly.

Also magic.

it's the most wonderful stress of the year

This time of year is so busy, and Saucy gets so much done, but she just doesn't seem to have the time to take pictures and blog about it.

You'll just have to believe her that she made some fabulous cookies this week. 

The presents are almost wrapped, but there's still some shopping to be done. Ugh.

At least the outside of the house is ready to go.

The urns are decked out with their assortment of Dollarama foliage. Even those vintage tin signs came from the dollar store.

Saucy is a little sheepish to admit, she paid twenty dollars for the birch branches. Everyone in this town is cutting down their birch trees and Saucy couldn't find anyone's garbage to salvage for her decorations. She bought the bundle at Superstore.

They're awfully darn nice, though.

Even Mother Nature has been too busy to make it snow. She's probably got a list a mile long, just like you and Saucy do.

If you could take just one task off your list, what would it be?

team effort

This Saturday, the Cheerios had their first cupcake sale in an actual shopping mall. It was a little nerve-wracking, trying to figure out how many cupcakes to make for that kind of event. Saucy figured it would be pretty busy, being a nice suburban shopping centre - a couple of weeks before Christmas and all. She wanted to make and sell as many cupcakes as possible, without having leftovers.

Leftovers, although they've never happened to us, would not be cool.

What would you do with leftover cupcakes other than eat them?

There were some delicious new varieties, however. The Vanilla Snowball. Those went fast.

The Nanaimo Bar cupcakes were a hit, also.

We always make Grasshoppers and they always sell well.

The Saturday Special was new, the Reese Lover's cupcake: chocolate topped with vanilla buttercream, a Hershey square, chocolate shavings, Reese's Pieces and a miniature Reese's peanut butter cup. We don't usually do anything with peanut but we had some requests so we tried it, and yes, it was also a hit.

The Red Velvets were dressed for the holidays with jaunty, fat little marshmallow gingerbread boys that hitched a ride home from Chicagoland Target with Saucy.

The Salted Caramels were new and they were delicious. So we were told. We didn't get to try any, they sold so fast.

By popular demand, the Breakfast Special made one more appearance this year.

Thankfully, we had all hands on deck Friday night - baking, frosting, decorating and counting. The counting usually trips us up. Don't laugh... *insert cheerleader joke here*.

What are The Cheerios learning by cupcaking? They are learning to be self-sufficient, that things like trips and competitions and uniforms won't just be handed to them because they're so cute. They're learning valuable skills in the kitchen (measuring, finishing, planning, presentation). They're gaining entrepreneurial skills and how to deal with customers. They have to count cash and make change - and on Saturday they even had to go to the bank to change in large bills for smaller ones.

Lastly, it's all about teamwork. A bake sale of this proportion will only work if every single girl comes out and helps out. This is not just a bake sale, people. This is a life lesson, with frosting.

The traditional "money shot" is the best part of the day. The table was empty - not a crumb in sight - in under three hours. In fact, the Cheerios are invited back on December 22nd for another kick at this cupcake and Saucy is left to wonder... how many to make for that event?

On Saturday they pushed 600 cupcakes, but many of them were pre-ordered and picked up at the mall. But, the 22nd is a Thursday and we can be at the mall from 9:00 AM - 9:00 PM if we so wish.

So, any suggestions? Saucy will make you eat the leftovers, if there are any.

saucy's holiday wish list

It's almost Christmas and Saucy hasn't even thought about what she wants. Usually she has a list a mile long, she's greedy like that. She gawked around in Chicago but nothing really jumped up or turned her crank.

Veto bought her a shiny new Jeep a couple of weeks ago. Clearly, she's spoiled. Christmas already came this year, but a girl can dream, can't she?

Sure, she needs new pyjamas and slippers... but don't we all? What does Saucy want?

Saucy wants fresh-smelling Soap and Glory bath products from Shoppers Drug Mart. There's something about the fragrance that reminds her about being a kid, it's like a scent that was in The Fan's makeup vanity or something. She just lurrves it.

She kinda wants a Mrs. Obama doll. No word of a lie. It's awesome. 

The  silver Tiffany bracelet she's worn every day for ten years has pretty much plum worn right out. The clasp isn't working anymore and the tag is worn so thin, it's going to fall off any day now. She might like to switch it up to another style, maybe the heart tag. It looks like it won't wear away as fast.

And speaking of jewelry, her pearl earrings are also worn down and mismatched now. She needs a new pair, badly. She wore the same pair every single day since she was sixteen and a couple of years ago she lost one so she got a crappy little replacement pair at Winners and so began a series of lost earrings with bad backs and lately she's been wearing crappier earrings from Claire's. You know, the one dollar kind. From bad to worse.
A measuring cup that is also a scale. This is probably way more practical than jewelry.

This is what saucy needs... a scraper beater blade attachement for the stand mixer. Oh, how she covets this!

Oh... and an extra K45 bowl for the stand mixer. Cupcake baking bees would be so much easier if only Saucy had one more of these bowls. The one with the handle, please.

Baker's twine in stylish colours... available here.

She and Loopy both want retro Pan Am flight bags! Hey, where did that show go? They liked it. She wants the show to come back on the air... can someone do that?

And the last thing Saucy wants is... um... enough said. Available here.

There are even more things to wish for on Saucy's Pinterest board here.

It's an odd list, Saucy knows it. She wonders... what's on your wish list this year? If you spill it here, it might come true.

lost voice

Well, it's official. Saucy has lost her voice. She has a thin, raspy little squeak where her voice used to be. It started yesterday but right now, it's a complete loss.

She did errands around town today without the ability to say please, thank you, or get the hell out of my way. She couldn't get a coffee in the drive-through line because she couldn't yell into the speaker. The girl at the candy counter thought Saucy was deaf and started doing a little makeshift sign language over rock candy and chewing gum.

If you have any tips or hints, please share them. In the meantime, Saucy is going to attempt having the Cheerios over tomorrow night to bake 500 cupcakes for the big sale on Saturday. So if you have a cure or concoction, make it speedy.

She might be in serious trouble this weekend.

lies chelsea handler told them

Saucy has returned no worse for the wear after a very quick weekend trip to Chicago.

This annual trip to the Windy City has become a tradition whereupon Saucy and Veto join up with Veto's cousin, The Warden and his wife... The Inmate. If you knew them, you would know these are apt nicknames indeed.

The first lie occurred when Saucy asked for a small refrigerator to be brought to her hotel room. She figured that stocking up on yogurt and milk at Walgreens would keep her blood sugar somewhat stable with all the martinis she was planning to partake in. Plus, she likes to have a little spot to stash cupcakes and whatnots in her hotel room. She bade Veto to do her dirty work and he phoned the concierge and explained that his wife needed a small fridge to store her medication, would they bring one up after all? This is most certainly a partial lie... Saucy does store her ample medications in the refrigerator but she did not have any with her on this particular trip. She felt guilty for a fleeting moment about the lie but at four in the morning when she awoke thirsty and peckish, she was glad of a job well done.

When she got home, she took some of her medication right away because Karma's a bitch like that.

Another lie happened at... where else... the bar. Saucy readily admits that she relishes the signage that claims "we ID all patrons" because deep down she thinks maybe, just perhaps, the bartender might suspect her to be *cough* under twenty one. The brandishing of ID validates her youthful and some might say immature behaviour in these establishments.

The Inmate, she was unprepared for such a falsehood of self-esteem and was without a bar card on this particular evening. Of course, she happened to be craving a glass of wine and the young woman behind the bar nodded to the sign... it appeared that The Inmate would be the designated babysitter of the group.

While Saucy was pulling out her ID, she found something she forgot she'd been carrying. Loopy's learner's permit, expired from a year ago. Hmm.... could it work? Could The Inmate pass for a fifteen year old? Was the lighting that flattering?

Apparently so. The young woman scanned the foreign identification with a surly brow, all nodding and serious. She gazed up at The Inmate and down again at the card. She paused, switched cards, eyed Saucy and nodded again. She returned to the other card and Saucy felt a nasty knot form in her unmedicated gullet. Why so serious?

Friends, it was the fleeting sort of feeling that came on weekends between the years 1984 and 1988. The nervous perspiration, the passing of someone else's card... attempting to look thirty four instead of eighteen. Except... it was the exact opposite. But the feeling, it was familiar.

The employee fingered the card for a moment curiously and Saucy thought they were busted for sure. As in the late eighties, Saucy felt that if her friend failed the card test then she too would have to go dry in solidarity and it did not look good. It did not look good at all.

And then, the cards were handed back and the drink orders were taken. The deed had been done. The Inmate had passed off Loopy's ID as her own and we were left to our own devices at the wine bar.

The last lie was a whopper.

During dinner, still high from the excitement of passing the false ID, Saucy was approached by a genial young fellow. "Excuse me," he said, "are you Chelsea Handler?"

"Why yes, I am" purred Saucy. At that moment she got a kick under the table from Veto who by this time has been forced into lying to the concierge and witnessed the miracle of the ID. Don't do it, the kick said. Don't pull this guy's leg. He looks nice.

He was nice. He is so nice. He asked for a picture with Chelsea and Saucy fessed up. He kinda sorta didn't believe her at first. She insisted that she was no more than a third rate blogger who scammed bar fridges and ran fake ID's out of her Juicy clutch.

Saucy is a lot of things, Dear Reader. She's no Chelsea Handler.

He returned to the table for a photo op and a visit later. His name is Skippy Jessop and he's going to be famous someday. He told great stories - all of them true - about the celebrities he's met and the ones he's been photographed with. Some of them are mean but most of them are not. You can check out his website here, he's the real deal. He and Saucy are Internet friends now and you should follow him too!

You can read about Skippy's fascinating brushes with fame and find out why and how he ended up in Chicago to study acting at the Piven Theatre Workshop on his website. Go on, check it out. It's a really funny story. Follow him on Twitter, if you're one of those people.

very traditional

Saucy managed to get the tree up sooner rather than later this year... she even got the foyer tree up and the stair garlands are hung, but she'll show those to you next week.

It's not a theme tree this year like others - no particular colour scheme... but an assortment of all the traditional mercury glass ornaments that have been saved and passed down over the years. Saucy is especially happy with her new 10 foot slimline pre-lit tree to show them off. The other tree she had for this room was just too full and fat, it looked a little cramped. The pre-lit tree is the cat's pyjamas. Saucy will never look back now.

Saucy likes her Christmas trees the way she likes her men: a little on the taller side, not too thick, and easy to manage.

With the new kitchen looking so old fashioned and traditional, this just seemed like a nice way to go with the main tree. No, the presents aren't wrapped yet. But this is one big task off the list. Time to get shopping! Saucy is off to Chicago to hit the Magnificent Mile over the weekend. Next week, the wrapping. Ugh.