Reader! It's me! Over here! Over here! Loooky! I'm Duke! Duke! The Duke of Windsor. Remember me? I live with Saucy and Veto. Life is good. Today, not so good for Saucy. She's got the hormone problems. She wants her estrogen back. In some unfair alternate universe there is a Saucy wearing a patch who does not have a splitting headache and hot flashes. I feel sorry for Mother Saucy. When she is low on hormones, she is low on energy. When she is low on energy, we miss our morning run. Well... I don't! She does! I still run without estrogen, see...
Dog lovers! Don't write to Saucy and tell her how bad she is. She will ignore your pleas for common sense and dog humanity. She will tell you that dogs need exercise but that Saucy isn't always up for the task nor the duration of it. She will continue to allow me to chase the vehicle in a safe and secure area. Do not report Saucy to the SPCA. She has donated enough money to them and rescued enough strays that they will turn a blind eye to this behaviour at any rate. It's called hush money, people.
Again... dog lovers! Do not berate my beloved Saucy for giving me deep fried pastry. I lurrve me some Timbits. When I see the magic sign, my tail wags uncontrollably. When she turns the corner into the drive thru, I see spots. Magical, sugary, cinnamon spots. When the girls on the loudspeaker hear Saucy's voice, they know I'm in line! They all run to the window to give me mad props. They dig my intense gaze and my brawny good looks. I'm like some sort of Dog God, a canine Leonardo DiCaprio. I just want everyone to register to vote. Please register.
This is me, waiting for Loopy to come out of her school. Check out my focus! It's like I think she will emerge wearing a brown visor and a hairnet or something. The boys will come out first, carrying their skateboards and this will intrigue me but I will not waver in my mission to bring Loopy to the Jeep. I have a job, people - and I take it seriously!
Mission accomplished. Time for a nap. Well, I've lived here over a year and I have no real complaints. Veto is a little soft on me. He adores me. Saucy seems to be the disciplinarian. Despite her efforts to corrupt me with donuts, I eat very well... a special blend raw food diet for my allergies. Thank Dog I'm not allergic to fritters!
I miss The Fan and The Secret Weapon. We drove past their house today and I let out a plaintive "whoof" as we sped by. I think I may have cried, but then I saw a Starbucks. I lurrve me some bear claws!